Thanksgiving has been my favorite holiday since I was a young tot (see photo above) but I am sad to say that the holiday I look forward to all year is quickly becoming a non-holiday or a noliday in my family.
Yes I look forward to the food. Yes I look forward to football, but neither of these things can be enjoyed if the whole family isnt together.
Ever since my grandfathers passing, my brother moving to Florida and my aunt deciding not to travel on holidays Thanksgiving is just NOT the same. So I sit in this awkward stage. The stage between my childhood traditions and creating new traditions with my future family. Its just uncomfortable. It doesn't feel right. Like Oreos without the creme filling. Like your shoes on the wrong feet.
So instead of playing football in the yard, or dominating puzzles with the cousins. I sat in one spot on the couch for 6 HOURS. I watched the Cowboys disappoint (close game) and the Aggies pull through for a win against the Longhorns (WHOOP!)
Am I changing? Could it be that Im..... ready...? Shhh I dont want to say the word. But am I getting to the point where my spontaneity and freedom is settling down and being replaced by another desire? A desire to... wed? Oh great.
...thought so much about my own wedding than I have in the last 48 hours.
I am not the kind of girl who
buys bridal magazines
looks at engagement rings
decides on bridesmaids dresses
picks wedding venues before I even have a boy toy
makes a wedding scrapbook
doodles my name with the last name of any guy who speaks to me
and I definitely wont be doing those things for a while BUT I will blame a couple of things that are contributing to this wedding coma.
1. Prince Williams Engagement
Even though I'd pick his ginger brother, the thought of their nuptials make me giddy. The sight of that stunning sapphire gives me a feeling comparable to the time when every student in the room writes their name on their paper. FIRST and LAST. The feeling that makes the corners of mouth my curl and warms the cockles of my heart.
2. Christmastime
Christmastime is home to many of my favorite things including but not limited to the NSYNC christmas album, grandmas fudge cookies, and annual happy hours. But there is something else Im looking forward to other than Red CUPS at starbucks...Its a little game I like to call.... "Predict how many people you know will get engaged between Thanksgiving and New Years". Always entertaining. Always shocking. Always at least 6 people.
Who will it be this year?
3. This Girl Maid of Honor is definitely an honor when you get to work with this superstar. For starters she's hot. But other than that, her brilliant organizational skillzzz make me second guess my shambles of a brain and how I will ever throw myself a wedding with the mess and a half that I am. The insight makes me want to start NOW...even if it may be a while.
4. This song
This song came on my Pandora Station a couple weeks ago and I cant stop listening to it. Not helping matters
5. 1 in 4 of everyone I know is engaged.
Either I only know 4 people or thats a lot of wedding.
6. My students
I cant go 3 days without having this conversation at work
Student: "Who is your husband?"
Me:"I dont have one"
S:"You dont?"
M:"Nope :)"
S:"ummmmmmmmm...You dont?"
M:"Nope. I have too much to do before I have a husband"
S:"But you're too pretty not to have a husband"
M:"Thank you, student. Ill go ahead and keep you in my back pocket now and pull you out for future times when Im feeling down on myself"
SO I will end with this.
Im not complaining. Im not unhappy. Im not craving a wedding or even a marriage at that. I am just stating that I've started to have thoughts and maybe some opinions about what that day(english countryside) in the far future (british) may look like (wearing glasses). Thanks world.
While its hard to support and rally for such a disappointing season, I still remain loyal to my Cowboys. Their, what could have been, cinderella season has proven to fall short (how long is short?) of such a fairytale ending. My frustration grows each week but my feet deeper still. Im not going anywhere...Cowboys fan for life.
Jones may have gotten one thing right, firing of Wade Phillips mid season, but I still cant help but greive a little. Sure Phillips is ridiculously wealthy, sure he should retire anyway. Sure who cares about a footbal coach...that sucks... But someone out there tonight wont be sleeping. Will lay eyes wide shut recounting mistakes and questioning "what next".
If only Phillips could have pulled tricks like this
I woke up to the sounds of a sleeping house. The vent whistled with streams of warm air flushing my face. I held my eyes shut. I didnt want to know what time it was. I swung my arm around my body to the bedside table fumbling for Nokia 1999. A bottle of lotion and a tv remote later I finally grasp my cell phone "6:39 AM....crap!" I immediately blamed Nokia 1999 for my lateness. I set her alarm! or did i? I conversed with my thoughts and came to the conclusion...I passed out last night in bed at 9:30 still wearing what I wore to work.( 2nd time this week) No alarm was set.
I sigh imagining the future of this day. I guess it will be another circus at work. Balancing papers on spinning pencils from every limb and facial feature while doing cartwheels trying to dodge kids and their repetitive questions. If I hear one more student ask "Ms Terry whats my grade?" I might explode and go climb Mt Everest or something drastic. I love how they wait until the Friday of the marking period to worry about their grade.
Wait. Friday? YES....yesterday was FRIDAY. Which means no 6:30 wake up call. My toes began to dance and my fingers did a little shift and point, still too tired to expose my excitement full out. I roll back over hug my pillow and fall fast asleep. I had more dreaming to do.
Its a beautiful Saturday morning while doing laundry and cleaning.
I hope you got to sleep in a little today.
I hate halloween. Im all for creativity and dressing up, but not when the majority of the population uses it as an excuse to get wasted and wear as little of clothing as possible. I'd rather....be covered in cockroaches than put on a cat woman or bunny costume. Actually, there are a couple miserable things I'd rather do than celebrate Halloween... for example
a) do the dishes
b) talk to a stranger about politics
c) listen to "the situation" talk about his abs
But I do love pumpkins, I do love painting and I do love penguins.
Combining those three things brings me great pleasure.
(I also love men in scarfs and men in glasses. even if my man is just a penguin on a pumpkin)
