Wednesday, September 2, 2009

"England Shmingland"

I have had some heavy thoughts on my mind lately. Im not really a fan of publicly posting long, boring, pictureless posts of my deepest thoughts, but I DO enjoy writing and I haven't been doing enough of it. And since only 18 people admit to reading this rubbish of mine, I feel safe posting more rubbish :)

Im going through a pre-quarter life crisis. I moved to Austin February 14th, the day of love, to escape heartbreak from the "man" I loved to start a new life. This to many is no secret. I now love everything about Austin. I love the city, I love the lakes, I love the hills. I LOVE my job. Moving away from Dallas and College Station burying the last 7 years of memories, for me, was the best decision I ever made. 

But thats not really the point of this post. I have no doubt in my mind that Austin is where I need to be right now. I have met fantastic people and work in a supportive school with loving and well-behaved (for the most part) students. I truly could not ask for anything better.  But is there something better?

Maybe its the fact that the one year mark since I left for England just recently passed that has it on the forefront of my mind. Or Maybe its the fact that I felt closer to God in England than I did the entire 4 years I was engulfed, saturated in a, what felt like, 40,000 member "Christianity Competition" during college at Texas A&M. Or maybe its the fact that I am intrigued by England's school system and see faults in the US school system daily. Or maybe its the facebook messages and emails that I STILL receive DAILY from my students in England. 

Either way England has been heavily on my mind for months.  I loved being able to wear coats in England. I loved being able to take public transportation anywhere and everywhere. I loved being surrounded by culture and that other cultures were so close by. I loved that it is common to be bilingual. I loved that they have a NATIONAL FUNDRAISER with Pudsey Bear for Children in Need.  I love  that, as a whole, the British people seem to be more educated on world wide events and happenings. 
Embarrassing confession: When I moved there I still thought the Prime Minister was Tony Blair. But thats more than some people!
I do LOVE USA...alot...alot, alot. I am PROUD to be an American, BUT I cant help myself but to dream of exploration beyond Texas, beyond America. 

So this morning I woke up and made Twinings, my English Breakfast Tea, for the first time since I have been back. I poured in some milk and dazzled it with some sugar sipping it slowly to savor every sip. I even brought an extra tea bag to school for a second cup. I turned up James Morrison and happily danced around my empty classroom until the bell rang at 8:13.  And after an almost half hour chat, Damien, "La Rockstar", and all his English-ness (what are you? english? british? united kingdomian? half french?) also has me dreaming of  exploring England.

I have been praying about this and ask for your prayers as I continuously fight the battle of my goals and path versus the goals and path God has already decided on.

Hope this wasnt too mushy gushy for ya. Ill be back to posting meaningless, nonsense posts tomorrow. Just thought Id throw ya a curve ball

Until next time, Good Night


Katie said...

Oh Taylor. I miss England too! If you ever get sad, tell me what you miss, because chances are that I miss it too. :)

I love black tea with milk and sugar.

I love James Morrison (loved his music before he came here!).

I love the public transportation there.

I hated the school system when I first moved to England but I now realize that I was much more prepared for college than I would have been otherwise.

Awww, I miss England!!!

Caroline Henley said...

I totally understand! I miss Italy all the time. I am down to move to England if you ever want a buddy :)